Drafting Seniors

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Drafting Seniors

Postby Droxor » Thu Aug 20, 2009 4:05 pm

Got this in an email and thought I would share.

===================
> New Direction for any
> war: Send Service Vets over 60!
>
> I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to
> track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to
> join the military. They've got the whole thing
> ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to
> fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be
> able to join a military unit until you're at least
> 35.
>
> For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex
> every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a
> couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
> additional seconds per day to concentrate on the
> enemy.
>
> Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and
> a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts!
> I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We
> are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that
> desperately deserves it
> will make us feel better and shut us up for a
> while.
>
> An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before
> 10 a..m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the
> hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't
> sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up
> killing some fanatical s-of-a-b....
>
> If captured we couldn't spill the beans because
> we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and
> serial number would be a real
> brainteaser.
>
> Boot
> camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to
> getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft
> food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns.
> We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out
> of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
>
> They could lighten up on the
> obstacle course however. I've been in combat and
> didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over
> the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing
> basic training.
>
> Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy,
> too. I've never seen anyone outrun a
> bullet.
>
> An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's
> still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a
> pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a
> baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of
> his head.
>
> These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to
> learn a little more about life before sending them off into
> harm's way..
>
> Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward
> terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a
> couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and
> automatic weapons who know that their best years are already
> behind them.
>
> ***How about recruiting Women over 50 ...with PMS !!! You
> think Men have
> attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!
> If nothing else, put them
> on border patrol.... they will have it secured the
> first night!
> Share this
> with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type
> so they can read it.
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Droxor
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